art.

To be honest, sometimes i really hate art. And myself because of it. I always asked myself why do i have to like drawing and painting and all this shit. Why can't i just be like other people liking normal everyday things and mingle around. Why do I like sitting all alone in my room enjoying my own solidarity? Why i have to get involved in this art shit. Other people do maths science business, likes going out, having friends, taking pictures, having meal together and im with this shit. And no one gets me. My parent doesnt get me.

And if im normal like the others, Id probably be a little bit smart, some friends, and a clearer future.

I have always thought that it is a phase. i mean i like, have interest on a lot of things. Back then, i used to think that. Maybe in the future I'd be having a conversation and saying things like

"I used to draw, paint back then"

But then i look back, I pick up graphic design, painting sketchbooks all that since i was 12. I am 21 now. Shits been 9 years. I still am doing the same thing now, if not same i just fucking upgraded my shit. From A4 paper to a fucking canvas.

Anyway the picture above indicate that i am currently reading this book of Van Gogh's painting and his life works. That's the Wood Gatherers in The Snow painting i believe. My favorite part of it is the sun set behind or sun rise? I don't remember. But yeah, they are having this exhibition in Tokyo of him and i want to go, but im not even halfway through the book because it is thickk lol. Im afraid going would give me some sort of spoiler or something you know. I think im going anyway tho, on my birthday i supposed. But yeah till then.

(I know they are a lot of things to update and kinda want to show some pictures too. Besides, i like reading things from the past. I hope I have more やる気 to do it. )