senior year two.

ssup. hehe

Not long from now, literally tomorrow I am going back to college from what said the longest 'vacation' we will ever have here and now the vacations ending. You know this makes me feel like that scene from Toy Story where Andy is leaving for college lol. Yall probably wondering why I sound so sad lol like relax everybody goes through a semester then holiday. Well true but our vacation doesnt usually lasts months like everyone else's. As I said this is the longest which is four weeks. And which is like the first time ever in 2 years of college, its usually two weeks at bests.

Unfortunately, it is ending and this year would be the senior year. Oh yes fabulous. I couldn't help but thinking of my senior in high school. It was all glory. I think the reason that I couldn't be happy here in college because I keep comparing the present to my glory;past. But it's hard to forget the rich and glory. Notice how we keep repeating the sejarah melayu melaka in history lol, word. But I hope it is not to late to start living in the present? I mean just for once I wanted to appreciate the people and the situation around me. Stop comparing every person, situation, accident from my present with the past. And live. 

Every semester is grinding and hard works and all that overwhelmed feelings. Sometimes it's the pain that stopped me into realizing the reality beneath. I keep hiding, shielding myself from the world because apparently it is too cruel to me. I am not gonna lie that it forcefully dragged me out of the comfort zones tho, there are days where I felt like it is the end. But sometimes I want to voluntarily step out and fight. I lacked the courage. 

I felt sorry for the one who had to face the masked me because I am too scared. I don't want to get hurt. You deserve more.

This holiday nothing much just the internet as usual. You know usually I recharged myself, my wisdom(ehek) and everything by watching movies and stuffs. But the wifi got cut and I can't download any until yesterday, it sucks. What can I do anyway, not the first time. I had a good time, my siblings here at home, it was good. Heard a bunch of radio lewl you know Music Access with Bernard and Day6 Jae on Monday, (an avid DAY6's fan ehew), probably heard all of em. For some reason I could relate with Bernard most of the time lol. 

About the senior year tho, a year left before flying. I don't know what to expect. Just I always pray I would be happier. Sadly living just feel so bad. I want to get it done at least happier, appreciating people around me, contented. Honestly, I made this promise long time ago but if I get through this, I would just probably wail out and write a blog post about it AHAHAHAH #typical. Managed a few blog posts these four weeks, impressive. Well, I'll update more about it as we go. 

Thank you for all the great experiences. Last day of long weeks of sipping coffee and write a blog post while listening to bomb songs. It has been great. Back to workin'. Pray for me. To all the batchmates (0 probability yall be reading this but im just saying this to myself), we cool , I've said this before friendship may not come easy to us but we cool, and we stay cool. May God bless. 

Cheers.